I recently saw an interview with a controversial billionaire where he stated empathy is “the fundamental weakness of Western civilization”.

Mustering all of my empathy, I say with my whole heart, empathy is the opposite weakness, it is strength.

Empathy requires the resilience and bandwidth to respectfully understand another’s experience without making it about you. In order to be empathetic, you must be secure in yourself so you can be adaptable and able to suspend judgement so you can see another person’s perspective. You must have emotional awareness so you can feel your own emotions as well as feel another’s emotional experience without getting defensive or offended.

Empathy is our single greatest ability to heal humanity. When we are able to understand that the circumstances in which we come into this world are essentially a crapshoot, we make room for another’s experience on this earth.

Deepak Chopra gives a great example on practicing empathy. Imagine someone you disagree with wholeheartedly. Now picture sitting in a movie theater and watching this person’s life story, including everything that has happened to them and what they’ve been exposed to. Chances are, you would be able to say “I might not agree, but I see how they feel the way they feel.”

The truth is we will never really know what another person’s life experience is like. This is the beauty of being human – no one person’s life experience looks like another. We are all here trying to figure out what we are doing. To dismiss and judge and diminish another person’s experience is the real weakness. It shows frailty and fear, not strength.

Does this mean that we allow people to take advantage of us? No, it means we make decisions from a position of understanding and power, not defensiveness and ignorance.

Here are some journal prompts to help build your empathy muscle. Remember, the goal is to do this without feeling defensive that you have had some privileges that others have been deprived of:

• Recall a time when you felt deeply misunderstood. How did it feel? What would have helped you feel seen and heard?
• Think about someone with whom you disagree strongly. Write about their life experiences that might have shaped their perspective.
• Reflect on a privilege you have that others might not. How might life be different without it?
• Remember a time when someone showed you unexpected empathy. How did it affect you? What specific actions made you feel understood?
• Consider a news story about people facing hardship. Beyond the facts, what emotions might these individuals be experiencing?
• Write about a conversation where you failed to be empathetic. What prevented you from connecting? What would you do differently now?
• Identify three people in your life from different generations. What unique challenges might each face that you don’t?